I’m sitting in this bed facing the closet. Behind me is a window with curtains, pulled apart left and right to let in the sun rays that brings in life in the room. I’m left thinking. Nothing is quite as romantic as hearing an honest, unabridged account of a married couples love story. And you are quite privileged when you can hear this story from your parents. I definitely dint get a chance to hear about how dad met mum. It must be one of the most beautiful stories to listen to.
Why am I saying this? I could only conclude that it was one of the finest fairy tales ever from how mum described dad. I grew up believing that love was the most beautiful thing that was ever invented. She never described how they ever met. She only gave me a simple account of their marriage. ‘He was a handsome young man when we met, God-fearing, kind, slow to anger, honest and the rest is history’, she uttered.
Wow! I sometimes still don’t believe that these words could come out of my mum’s mouth. Please don’t get me wrong. I’m just so surprised on how she says it. She does it with a lot of passion. She feels it to date. The love still exists even after she buried him 22 years ago. I mostly find myself using my family members as examples simply because; they are the closest and are perfect examples that I am sure of in various circumstances.
I am, by my own admission, a hopeless romantic. If such a thing is possible, I am in love with being in love. There’s nothing else quite like it, and if you’ve experienced it, you know what I mean. According to Joshua Harris in I Kissed Dating Goodbye, he describes being in love as a patchwork of a thousand indescribable moments. Nervous energy runs through your body whenever you think of that special person, which is every waking minute. But this is not the case with my mum.
At that moment you lose interest in the dull chores of eating, sleeping, and thinking rationally. You discover that every love song on the radio was written for you. You might laugh but it’s true. It seems that someone has removed blinders from your eyes, and you can see the world full of wonder and mystery and happiness. I love love. But I’ve come to realize that I don’t really know looking up “love” in God’s dictionary much about it. Someone is about to ask me if there is a definition of some certain words in Gods dictionary. What would my reply be to such a question? Yes of course there is!
Oh, stay with me. In my last article on Love, Life, God and Relationships I said that people can be obsessed with love, sex and relationships and most of us are infatuated with infatuation …I can tell you all about the warm, fuzzy side of love. I can throw myself into romance with all the passion of Romeo, but in God’s school of true love, I’m afraid I’m still in kindergarten. Oops! Poor me! To me and other romantics who share a “love for love,” God wants to give a higher, grander view. He wants to deepen our understanding. Romance can thrill us to our core, but it’s only a small part of true love. We’ve been playing in the sandbox.
God wants to take us to the beach. I cannot overemphasize the importance of gaining God’s perspective on love. We can link all of the negative habits of dating to adopting a fallen world’s attitudes toward love. And the conflict between God’s definition of love and the world’s is not new. Christians have always had a choice to either imitate the Master or slip into the more enticing pattern for love provided by the world. That sounds a bit funny. But wait. The apostle Paul understood this struggle when he wrote his famous chapter on love to the Christians living in Corinth. He must have realized the irony of his task. Aha! Not funny now.
In Paul’s day, writing to Corinthians about God’s love was the equivalent of writing a letter on family values to the African society today. “Corinthian” was synonymous with immorality. To “play the Corinthian” meant to give oneself to sexual pleasure. A “Corinthian girl” was another word for a prostitute. How could Paul hope to convey an understanding of God’s pure love to a city steeped in perversion? Now, stay keen and listen to this.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud (1 Corinthians 13:4).
As much as the bible describes love to be patient, how much patience could one develop when it comes to love and relationships? It’s been confirmed from various studies that it’s the human being nature to have the desire of getting what they want instantly. What am I trying to say? Most people have never taken their time to try understanding God’s perfect timing. Many people always want it like right now. We tend to long for love, romance and all forms of getting intimate outside God’s holy institution and that’s marriage. This does not mean that the key to having sex becomes marriage! Some married couples have found themselves in sin and I mean fornication a number of times. All these just to satisfy their lust.
The bustling, cosmopolitan, port town had elevated sex to a religious pursuit. The temple of Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love, employed one thousand prostitutes. How could these people possibly understand the true meaning of the statement “God is love” (1 John 4:16) when on every street corner and from every brothel someone offered their version of “love”–sensual pleasure–to them? Would they see the truth and beauty of real love in the midst of the seductiveness of its counterfeit?
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5).
Would Aphrodite or Christ triumph in Corinth? Would sensuality push out servant hood? Would sexuality have priority over selflessness? Would the readers of Paul’s humble letter choose the everlasting or the fleeting pleasure of the moment?
Today Christians endure the very same struggle. Though separated by some two thousand years, similarities abound between our culture and that of Corinth. More than ever, sex is a commodity. Sensuality and exaggerated sexuality shout at us on every corner, if not from brothels then from newsstands and billboards. “Love is sex,” a Calvin Klein ad whispers. “Sex is pleasure,” a movie tells us. And on the radio, “Pleasure is all that matters” is sung sweetly in our ears. In the midst of this harangue, God’s quiet message of true love still speaks to those who choose to listen. Can you hear it? Put down the magazine. Turn off the VCR. Pull the plug on the stereo and listen…
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13: 6-8).
Many will describe me to be too much biblical but as a matter of fact, these ideas that I bring together to put down in black and white really need a lot of proof. I prefer biblical proof. It is something that was written. Neither by me nor you, but by God’s own appointed people.
So before you claim to be in love, try asking yourself a number of questions. Am I honest with myself? Am I being honest with the partner that I claim to be in love with? Does God want me to be in this kind of ’’ relationship’’?
I really hope it impacts positively in someone’s life. Thank you for committing your time to read this article. I pray that God gives you the strength to exercise this in your life. Stay blessed. Cheers!